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Spark Conversations with ...

6/2/2024

 
One of the most effective and genuine ways to engage in small talk is by complimenting or inquiring about personal items someone has. This strategy not only breaks the ice but also opens the door to learning more about the other person's interests, tastes, and personality.
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Why Personal Items?
Personal items, whether it's a pen, a piece of jewellery, a book, or even a phone case, often carry stories or sentiments. They can reflect the owner's personality, interests, hobbies, or achievements. When you notice and comment on these items, it shows that you're paying attention and value what makes the other person unique.
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And now to more practical approach:
When You Know the Person:
  • Noticed your colleague sporting a new watch? A simple, "Hey, that's a sleek watch! Is there a story behind it?" can lead to an engaging conversation about personal tastes, recent celebrations, or memorable experiences.
When You Don't Know the Person:
  • At a networking event and spot someone with a unique pen? Break the ice with, "That pen caught my eye. It looks quite unique. Where did you find it?" This can open up a dialogue about interests, hobbies, or even lead to discussions on work-related topics if the pen has a professional significance.
The key is to be observant and genuine. Personal items are extensions of our identities and interests. By acknowledging them, you're not just making small talk; you're valuing what matters to the person. So, next time you're looking for a conversation starter, let the little things around you inspire your curiosity and connection.

SMALL TALK IS A TEST

31/1/2024

 
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Small talk is more than just casual conversation; it's a  key indicator of trustworthiness and social skil l. By excelling in small talk, you show that you understand social norms and have strong communication abilities. This not only helps in assessing mutual interests and compatibility, but also signals that you're a safe and reliable partner for deeper, more meaningful conversations. In essence, being adept at small talk opens the door to richer, more engaging interactions, making it a vital tool in effective social exchange.
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A post shared by Matthias James Barker, LMHC (@matthiasjbarker)

When "Sorry" Doesn't Cut It​

29/1/2024

 
We've all been there – a clumsy bump into a stranger, a small mistake at work – and out pops the instinctive "sorry." This simple word can be a social lifesaver, smoothing over the tiny ripples we make in our day-to-day interactions. But is "sorry" always enough? Let's explore when this magic word works and when it falls short.
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When "Sorry" is Generally Appropriate:
  • Minor Mistakes or Accidents: For small inconveniences or accidents, like bumping into someone or being a few minutes late, a simple "sorry" is usually sufficient.
  • As a Gesture of Politeness: In many cultures, saying "sorry" is a polite way to navigate minor social mishaps. It's a sign of good manners, whether you're slightly interrupting someone or asking them to pass the salt.
When "Sorry" Doesn't Cut It​
  • Serious Situations Need More: In cases of significant mistakes, harm, or offenses, a mere "sorry" can seem insincere or dismissive. These situations often require a more thorough acknowledgment of the harm caused, an explanation, and a commitment to making amends. Imagine you've accidentally spilled coffee on a colleague's important paperwork. Ouch. Here, a mere "sorry" can seem like you're brushing off the gravity of the situation. This calls for a more heartfelt apology, perhaps a promise to help fix the issue.
  • The Sorry Overload: Constantly apologizing for trivial matters or things outside one's control can come across as a lack of confidence or even insincerity. It can also diminish the impact of apologies when they are truly warranted. Ever met someone who says "sorry" for just about everything? Over time, this can come off as insincere, or it might seem like they're always walking on eggshells. In these cases, "sorry" loses its sincerity.
  • Sarcasm or Insincerity: A sarcastic "sorry" can be worse than no apology at all. This kind of sarcastic apology can be like a double-edged sword. It not only fails to heal the wound caused by the original mistake but often cuts deeper. Sarcasm in apologies is like saying, "I acknowledge the need to apologize, but I don't really mean it." It sends a conflicting message and can leave the other person feeling more disrespected and hurt than before.
Crafting a Meaningful Apology
  • Beyond the Basics: For complex issues, especially where emotions run high, a simple "sorry" won't do. A meaningful apology shows you understand what went wrong and why it hurt the other person. It's about taking responsibility and showing you're committed to making things right.
  • Building Bridges: In relationships, a thoughtful apology can do wonders. It's not just about saying "sorry" but also about explaining, understanding, and growing together.

INTRODUCING INKA

4/10/2023

 
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My INKA journey began with a clear realization: it had to be shorter, more flexible, yet rich with opportunities.

It was clear to me that many people had a strong desire to learn English but found it tough to commit to regular classes, especially with their busy lives. The traditional way of doing things just didn't fit into their schedules. This frustration was something I could relate to, and it made me want to find a solution.

That's how INKA came to be. I wanted to create something that would bridge the gap between ambition and reality. INKA was designed to complement the conversational classes I was already teaching because I knew my students were looking for an alternative that was more flexible and convenient.

The core idea behind INKA was beautifully simple—just 30 minutes of casual conversation practice each week. It was a way for people to stay connected with a language, keep up their fluency, and stay engaged without feeling overwhelmed by additional work. It was a lifeline for those of us with hectic lives.

But here's the thing: INKA isn't a one-size-fits-all solution. I've always been upfront about that. It's not for folks looking for a super intense, exhaustive language learning experience. INKA is for those who already use the language daily and want to keep it alive without any added stress. It's a handy refresher, an alternative that fits right into the modern world.

In the end, INKA is my way of bringing flexibility and practicality to language learning. It's about helping both my students and myself find joy and success in our language journeys without the need for extra tasks that can be burdensome.

​If you want to try INKA out or find out more, you can do it HERE.

INTERVIEWS WITH MY STUDENTS

10/7/2023

3 Comments

 
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I have never been to the USA. I have experienced the country through its people. I believe that the people reflect what the states are like - diverse, expansive, and hospitable. In today's episode, Ola takes us on her trip to Florida. Let's delve into her experiences.
All the images used in this post have been sourced from Ola's private collection. Feel free to click on them to enlarge.
Season 2, Episode 1 
The one where Ola tells us about the Florida vibe
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​Agnieszka: Hello Ola, thank you for joining us today. I heard you recently took a trip to the USA. Could you tell us about your experience?

Ola: Hello Agnieszka, thank you for having me. Yes, I had an amazing trip to the USA, visiting the Bahamas, Miami, and the Kennedy Space Centre.
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​Agnieszka: That sounds fascinating! Let's start with the Bahamas. What were some of the highlights of your time there?

Ola: The Bahamas was absolutely stunning. The ocean with its beautiful colours and the pristine beaches were the most memorable aspects for me. But one thing that stood out was the opportunity to see a big ship used for ocean crossings. It was fascinating to see how these ships, which seemed small from a distance, turned out to be extremely big when you got closer.
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Agnieszka: Moving on to Miami, what were your impressions of the city and Miami Beach?

Ola: Miami was quite different from the Bahamas. The city had impressive tall buildings and a lively atmosphere. Miami Beach offered breathtaking views of the ocean, and I was lucky to witness both sunrises and sunsets. I also discovered amazing art paintings and murals in certain parts of the city, created by 60 different painters. 

Agnieszka: It sounds like you had a diverse range of experiences in Miami. Did you have any favourite spots or activities in the city?

Ola: One of my favourite spots was an American-style restaurant that had a nostalgic atmosphere, just like the ones you see in movies. It had always been my dream to be in such a typical American restaurant with booths, and it felt like a step back in time. Another interesting sight was a building shaped like a guitar, which was quite captivating. As for activities, exploring the Kennedy Space Centre was both educational and emotional. Seeing real rockets and learning about space exploration history was truly fascinating.
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​Agnieszka: The Kennedy Space Centre sounds like a remarkable place. Can you tell us more about your experience there?

Ola: Of course! The Kennedy Space Centre was enormous and filled with awe-inspiring exhibits. It was an incredible experience to see real rockets up close and learn about the inner workings of the space centre. It was not only educational but also emotionally captivating, especially when we got a glimpse of how people worked there during the 1960s and 1970s. I think it's a place that can appeal to everyone, no matter their usual interests.
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​Agnieszka: One last question. Can you tell me about the estate where you stayed in Tampa?

Ola: Sure! The estate I stayed at in Tampa was absolutely charming. It was a typical American house with a small swimming pool and a cosy atmosphere. The neighbourhood was picturesque, with narrow streets and numerous houses, each featuring spacious garages. It felt like being part of a movie scene.
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We thank Ola for sharing her experience. Please leave a sign of your presence in the comments section below. 
Also, if you feel you would like to share your experience, passion or hobby in an interview just drop me a line. You know how much I will appreciate that. 
3 Comments

The Secret Struggles of Native and NoN-Native English Speakers

5/5/2023

 
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English is easy... but English is also hard. So don't worry, you're not alone in your struggles to understand the complexities of the language. In this post, we'll share some amusing examples of the challenges that both natives and non-natives can face when trying to master English. Join us for the ride and enjoy some witty insights!

Guided Self-Study

6/3/2023

 
​Unlock Your Language Learning Potential with Guided Self-Study
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As an adult professional learning English, it is important to set aside some time each week to prepare for your lessons. This could involve dedicating 15 minutes each week to review the materials covered in the previous class, familiarize yourself with the upcoming topics, and practice any relevant skills.

By taking this time to prepare, you will be better equipped to engage with your instructor during the lesson. You will also be more confident and better able to participate in discussions, ask questions, and express yourself in English.

Furthermore, dedicating just 15 minutes a week to review and practice can help you reinforce what you've learned and build upon your knowledge and skills over time. This can lead to greater fluency and proficiency in the language.

I want to inform you that starting in March, I will be offering the opportunity for guided self-study to help you further enhance your language learning experience. 

During the guided self-study sessions, you will have the opportunity to practice and reinforce the material covered in your regular lessons. The materials and activities provided will be designed to help you review and consolidate what you have learned in class, and to further develop your language skills.

This venture is primarily addressed to those of you who have been struggling with coming prepared to the lesson or whose self-study has been inconsistent.  
How does that work?

You have a look into my booking calendar each week and choose a 15min slot that you can devoted to self-study.
I prepare a task, or a set of tasks for this period of time. I am also available on Zoom during this period to assist you if you need further guidance or explanation.  
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Book
​your 15-min slot here


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Poker FACE And VALENTINE BLUFF

13/2/2023

 
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Ah, Valentine's Day. That special day where love is in the air and couples everywhere are celebrating their love for one another. But what about those of us whose dancing days are gone? What do we do on this love-filled holiday when you are simply too advanced in age or the whole idea of sugar-coated holiday is just not for you ? Fear not, dear reader, for I have the perfect solution: playing cards for money.

That's right, forget about fancy dinners or romantic walks on the beach. Who needs all that when you can sit at home and gamble away your life savings? And what better way to show your significant other you care than by winning big bucks off of them in a heated game of poker?

Sure, some might argue that gambling is a dangerous addiction and that you should spend your time doing something more meaningful. But let's be real, what's more meaningful than the thrill of the bet and the rush of adrenaline that comes with it?

And think about the benefits of playing cards for money on Valentine's Day. You don't have to worry about dressing up or going out in the cold. You can just cosy up on the couch with your sweetheart and let the cards do the talking.

Plus, you might also take advantage of other risky habits like smoking cigars, cigarettes or pipes - cards love them. Or a glass of bourbon or other fancy drink - whenever I watch people playing cards these are always somewhere at hand.  

So there you have it, folks. The perfect Valentine's Day activity for those of us who can't and most of all shouldn't dance any more. Just remember to gamble responsibly and not to let your winnings go to your head. After all, love may be priceless, but winning big at poker is pretty sweet too.

The Fine Line of Discussing Others in Small Talk

1/2/2023

 
Talking about others during small talk can be a double-edged sword, and whether it's a good idea depends largely on the context, the nature of the conversation, and the relationship between the people involved.
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The Pros of Talking About Others in Small Talk
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Common Connections: Discussing mutual acquaintances or public figures can serve as common ground, making it easier to foster a connection when you don't know someone very well.

Networking: In professional settings, talking about others can be a way to network and establish mutual connections, potentially opening doors for future opportunities.
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Social Bonding: Sharing opinions or news about others can sometimes strengthen bonds between people who already share a close relationship, as it can be a way to communicate values and preferences.
The Cons of Talking About Others in Small Talk

​Risk of Gossip: Conversations about others can quickly veer into gossip, which might hurt someone's reputation or feelings if the information is shared carelessly or maliciously. 

Privacy Concerns: Discussing others without their consent can infringe on their privacy, especially if personal details or sensitive information is involved.
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Misinterpretation and Misinformation: There's always a risk that the information being shared is incorrect, which can lead to misunderstandings and spread misinformation.
Guidelines for Navigating Conversations About Others

Keep it Positive: If you choose to talk about others, focus on positive or neutral topics. Sharing achievements, common interests, or compliments can be safer grounds.

Be Mindful of Privacy: Avoid sharing personal or sensitive information about others. Stick to what is publicly known or shared in mutual circles.

Redirect if Needed: If the conversation starts to veer into uncomfortable territory, be prepared to steer it back to safer topics or shift the focus away from individuals.

Consent and Context Matter: Always consider the context and whether you have consent, either implicitly or explicitly, to share information about someone else.

3 short video CLIPS THAT MADE MY WEEK

2/12/2022

 
Happy Friday everyone! Let's step into weekend with a bit of inspiration and a whole lot of good vibes.
Below, You will find three really short clips that I've come across this week. I find them dead funny. Plus, all of them have some educational value. Hope you will enjoy them! 
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A post shared by Teacher Luke (@teacherlukerockwell)

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A post shared by Native English Teachers U.K. and USA (@english.study.camp)

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A post shared by Stand-up Comedy ? (@darkcomedyhub)

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    Written by Agnieszka Kansy​
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